点评:作者是一个酷爱篮球但成绩非常差的男同学。我鼓励他将他打篮球的经历写出来,尽管语句很多啰嗦与语病,但这不妨碍文字中的真诚。字里行间写出了他对篮球的坚持和热爱。写作时扣题方面做得还不太够,所以修改稿加了很多点明主旨的句子。这样一看,一篇优秀的作文诞生了。谁说差生写不好作文?!(指导老师:李小慧)我热爱篮球。我的梦想是成为篮球队员。小学时我因个子小,在篮球场上投球,连篮球框都沾不到,但我没放弃,又用尽全力投,一次,两次,三次……无数次后终于可以碰到篮板了,可球还是不进,放学时我又来到三分线上,又无数次连篮球框都投不到。路过的同学冷笑说:“都不 Comments: The author is a love of basketball but poor grades of male students. I encourage him to write down his experience of playing basketball, despite the many verbal and language sickness, but this does not prevent the sincerity of the text. Written between the lines of his insistence on basketball and love. There is not much to be done in the area of ​​writing at the time of writing, so the revised version adds a lot of sentences to clarify the subject. In this way, an excellent essay was born. Who says poor students write essay ?! (Instructor: Li Xiaohui) I love basketball. My dream is to become a basketball player. Primary school, I was a small child, pitching in the basketball court, even the basketball are not touch the box, but I did not give up, but also try my best to vote, once, twice, three times ...... After numerous times finally hit the rebound, Ball or not into, after school I came to three-point line, but also countless times even the basketball are not cast. Passing classmates sneer: ”No